Wayback Machine: Diary of a Landman

I was looking for something in my old myspace blog and I found this.

With all the hate mail my last "Diary of a Landman" drew I figured I'd toss this one out there and see what sticks.

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Diary of a Landman: No.1
Category: Life

there's not much on tv, and i ate a bunch of candy so i'm up. i really don't have any one thing that would fill out an entire blog post so this will prolly suck.



i drove 80 miles out of my way to go to the wal-mart in Atoka, Oklahoma this week.

scored this hoodie: jealous much?

i got bored earlier so i fake drew a sockmonkey. i like sockmonkeys. i want one for christmas. don't think i'll get one though.

true story: i bought my house in June. i went into the attic for the first time last week. i found some blankets, a set of ice skates, a lamp, and a jar of human teeth.

i think they are human teeth because the jar was labeled "Don's Teeth".

another true story: i worked in Mcalester, Oklahoma this week. i was checking into a hotel and i looked behind the front desk. there was a collage of baby pictures back there. in the center of the collage was the baby's name. it was called "Snowey Winters".

i then went to dinner at angel's diner. it is 1950's in theme and falls under common ownership with the "happy days hotel". i had the al's chicken strips and the slippin and slidin' mashed potatoes and gravy. i almost got the "fonzi's blt", but i gave up eating pork after i read what commercial pig farms do to the water supply.

whenever i'm staying in a hotel i never comb my hair before i go down for the continental breakfast. they're lucky i wear pants.

i went to the Norman municipal court on tuesday. i'm fighting three parking tickets. the assistant district attorney thinks i have a case.

last saturday i walked in the Norman christmas parade. we carried flags for a local bank and were in formation. i walked with my girlfriend, her dad, and her mom who works for said bank. My girlfriend's dad laughed when i asked if i could "goose step".

i wore my wampus cats hoodie back from Mcalester. i made a few stops but was not questioned about it until i got to the panera bread in Norman. there, i fielded two wampus cat questions.

the Pittsburg County courthouse in Mcalester, Oklahoma has a christmas tree in the lobby that sings christmas songs.

today i saw fire rescue and the paramedics responding to a call at my neighborhood grandy's. i'm sure they had to defibrillate some insanely fat person.

my office christmas party is tomorrow afternoon. here are the instructions i received in regard to "dirty santa".

Your Dirty Santa Gifts are chosen at your own discretion!!

They can be just something you have around the house - they can be - good, stupid, ugly, funny or dirty!!
It's up to you - No dollar amount!!


i'm bringing a jar of teeth.





in the thundering words of Jim Rome,

goodnight now